Gail Emory

Little Girl Lost

by Chris

Okay... doing things a bit differently. *g* Instead of going by episode, I'd like to make you see how I see Gail. I'm not trying to convince you of my point of view, just to try and explain it. Then you can pounce and tear it apart. *g* Oh, and please forgive me if this is chaotic... creative people are like this sometimes.

Most Gothniks I talked to so far don't particularly care for Gail Emory. Nosey, self-absorbed, "the intrepid reporter without a brain" - just a few of the terms that were used for her on this list over the past few months. Certainly no one would like a person who's described like this, would they? So why then have I become a Gail fan, instead of a Gail basher?

Maybe that is partially due to the fact that the first AG ep I ever saw was The Beast Within. I missed the first 10ish minutes, but what I saw got me hooked instantly. Of course I didn't have any idea of the character dynamics yet. I missed Inhumanitas, but from then on I saw every single episode. By then I had also caught up on the previous eps on the internet, especially through the Trinity Guardian's episode synopses. (RIP *sob*!) Instantly I was very intrigued with the Gail/Lucas storyline. And of course when Ring of Fire came up, and I knew what was in store for Plague Sower, I was like, "YES!!"

What intrigued me so about their relationship was that they are opposites, fighting on different sides. Yet they are attracted to each other. Do I dare say they (could/should) complement each other, in the sense of two halfes making a whole, opposites attract, etc.? I soon heard that originally there should have been a shot of a painting in the pilot, depicting Gail and Lucas, in 19th or whatever century clothes, clearly hinting at a past-life relationship. Why it was cut I don't know, but what remained in was that astonished look Lucas gives Gail when he first sees her in the attic of Caleb's house. This made their relationship still more fascinating for me. In EOYLG Lucas tells Gail something like, "What if there are higher forces at work? Something she can't compete with. An almost supernatural desire," which supports this. Of course you can argue that he was just playing mindgames, but from the way he says it, and the way he treated her from the beginning, I don't think so.

Ring of Fire - I liked it very much, not to speak of Plague Sower... *whimper* In these two eps, I got the feeling that Gail and me are similar in certain areas. I could relate to her being torn between her fascination - and love? - for Lucas, and her fear and revulsion of him. She saw him as evil - how can you possibly love someone who's evil? And what kind of person does that make you? When Gail found out in ROF that Lucas wasn't responsible for her parent's death, there was nothing specific anymore that could shield her against his charms. She thought she could cheat fate and keep it strictly physical: "No heart, no soul. That's the way you want it?" - "That's the way I want it." But she did fall for him nonetheless, though she never dared confess it, not to him, not even to herself probably, until she stood at his casket in TBSH. "Don't you know I love you?" Oh yes, he did, IMO. All along. And I also think he did feel something for her, he didn't just regard her as someone to breed with, a walking uterus. That little bit they cut from the Garden Scene (just after the no heart no soul exchange) in PS indicates this:

He nods, then reaches out, takes her face in his hands. Looks in her eyes. It's tender after all...

GAIL (fierce) No!

The look in his eyes changes to something dark and firghenting.

Also when he kisses her forehead at the end of PS - there was no one watching, and Gail was sleeping, so why should Lucas have done it if not because he cared for her?

When she learnt she was pregnant, she was shocked - not only had she gotten involved with an evil man, she now carried his child! How could this child not be evil? The thought of carrying a demon, an abomination, was too much for her. She had suppressed her qualms after getting involved with Lucas, but now everything came up again. How did this happen? How did she get herself into this situation? She should never have agreed to that deal! Stupid, Gail, stupid! Don't mess with the devil, you should have known better! She projected her anguish and anger at Lucas, and at herself. But she wasn't "strong" (or weak?) enough to kill herself. After Lucas' "death" she wanted to keep his child... because she did love him.


Gail was looking for the truth about her parents' death - surely that was incentive to become a reporter. Yet she only came to Trinity when she heard what happened to Caleb and his family. She was afraid. Afraid of the truth, afraid of what would happen when she found out... and afraid of the memories, the pain that would inevitably come up again. Thinking about Gail as I was trying to prepare for this, I came to the conclusion that she is just what the subject says - a little girl lost. When her parents died, she was sent away - I can't remember if she lived with family or in a foster home, but even if it was family, she'd probably never seen them before, and we don't know if she had a good life with them. Losing her parents left deep wounds in any case. The suppressed memories that came up again in ROF - and I do believe that the scenes of her childhood were genuine, not Lucas' machinations - must have influenced her subconsciously. Her behaviour shows that she has problems relating to others - including Caleb. I don't think she feels too comfortable around children, in varying degrees depending on their behaviour. Yes she wants to help her cousin and be there for him because she was in the same situation once, but she feels insecure. Very much so. That's why she relies on Matt so much, and makes so many errors. Her self-absorbedness isn't really this, I think, it's just that it's easier/safer to draw back inside your shell than open up and be hurt again - in a short-term point of view, which doesn't take into account the long-term consequences. I'm sure all of us have acted like this at some time in our life. Sometimes I wonder why Matt is forgiven his flaws, but not Gail, who was a child when she lost her family, her character still forming. Even if she fails often, we cannot say she does not try. I think once she would have admitted that she loves Lucas to him and to herself (yes she did at the casket, but I mean face-to-face with him), she would have been stronger and calmer, since she wouldn't have had to fight against her feelings anymore, and thus she could have become a more worthy partner - and nemesis. Because that is how I see her role. Partner and nemesis at the same time. His opposite, the Queen to the King, the day to his night, complementing one another, she bettering what he worsened, her good to even out his evil.

And curse the writers who didn't see that potential, and Moonves who robbed us of the possibility to see her evolve!

I can relate to her hurt. I can relate to her dilemma with her feelings for Lucas. I can relate to her emotional aloofness, her problems of forming attachments with others, especially children, and to her very flawed character, cause I have many of these flaws too. I think the nosey, self-absorbed, intrepid reporter without a brain and me could become good friends if we ever met. :-)

Again, apologies for the chaos in this post... These are just two of Gail's main character traits, I'm sure lots more will come up in the discussion.

*putting on her protective headgear and shouldering her trusty shovel, just in case* ;-)

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1. August 2002